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Showing posts from April 7, 2012

How To Love Family... Just A Dream

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 Jaybeato, Ma Dukes, Jacinda & Landon I am very close with my family. By family I mean my immediate family- my mom and 2 younger brothers.  My brothers live here in Charlotte and my mother lives in Florida. I would drop anything in a second to be there for any one of them if they needed me.  Recently I was stuck fighting myself on a decision that would ultimately hurt one, if not all of my family members. My brother Jaris "Jaybeato" is a musical genius. He raps, sings, and produces. He's been making music since he was a child. His music in my opinion is 'real music'. He rarely curses in his music and he rarely uses distasteful lyrics. I didn't say never, I said rarely. I love him with all my heart. I want my brother to succeed in a way that HE defines true success. Now to the problem. I have a hard time trying to find it in my heart to help promote his craft. I.E via social networking. In SOME of my brothers music there are lyrics that kind of c

How Can So Right Be So Wrong?

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 Have you ever went through life knowing that something is completely off... just downright wrong? I'm in that zone. Everyone is happy for me. Everyone is looking at me. I should be happy about it too but my stomach is in knotts. It's not for me. I did it. I tried it. Now I'm fighting with it. What did I get myself into? Now I'm searching for a way to get out but all I can do it look up. God lead me. Govern my steps. Did you want me here for some particular reason? Should I feel this way? Did you lead me here or was I misguided? I regroup daily to put on that smiley face. On my good days I am great but on a bad day I can't hide it. I've been down this road before. I was happy to see that road come to a dead end. I know this one is coming. Am I going to ruin it? Should I be grateful for it? It's hard. Being stuck between a rock and a hard spot is the saddest place to be in life. Life should be enjoyed. This is why God put us here. When do we draw the li