Showing posts from April, 2012

How To Love Family... Just A Dream


I am very close with my family. By family I mean my immediate family- my mom and 2 younger brothers.  My brothers live here in Charlotte and my mother lives in Florida. I would drop anything in a second to be there for any one of them if they needed me. 
Recently I was stuck fighting myself on a decision that would ultimately hurt one, if not all of my family members. My brother Jaris "Jaybeato" is a musical genius. He raps, sings, and produces. He's been making music since he was a child. His music in my opinion is 'real music'. He rarely curses in his music and he rarely uses distasteful lyrics. I didn't say never, I said rarely. I love him with all my heart. I want my brother to succeed in a way that HE defines true success.

Now to the problem. I have a hard time trying to find it in my heart to help promote his craft. I.E via social networking.

In SOME of my brothers music there are lyrics that kind of catch me off guard. I understand this is him desc…

How Can So Right Be So Wrong?

Have you ever went through life knowing that something is completely off... just downright wrong? I'm in that zone. Everyone is happy for me. Everyone is looking at me. I should be happy about it too but my stomach is in knotts. It's not for me. I did it. I tried it. Now I'm fighting with it. What did I get myself into? Now I'm searching for a way to get out but all I can do it look up. God lead me. Govern my steps. Did you want me here for some particular reason? Should I feel this way? Did you lead me here or was I misguided? I regroup daily to put on that smiley face. On my good days I am great but on a bad day I can't hide it. I've been down this road before. I was happy to see that road come to a dead end. I know this one is coming. Am I going to ruin it? Should I be grateful for it? It's hard.
Being stuck between a rock and a hard spot is the saddest place to be in life. Life should be enjoyed. This is why God put us here. When do we draw the line …