Loving

It’s so crazy to me how someone can be married for 63 years.  Ro and I always say we want that.  We want to grow old together.  We want to be that couple that looks like each other (lol- I think they’re so funny and cute at the same time). 

When we first got together the love I felt for him was powerful.  It was so fast and so extreme.  I almost caught myself wishing we would be a year into our relationship already so it could all make sense.  How can you really tell a girlfriend or a family member that after only a couple of days you’re madly in love?

On the flipside I wanted to stay in that moment forever because I know what goes up must come down and the high I was on I never wanted to come down from.  I also remember different people kept telling me enjoy this moment because once the honey moon phase ends you’ll never get it back it’s then that you will have a different kind of love for him.  It’s love that you have to work on.  I didn’t understand it and I didn’t want to believe it. 

Ro and I have been living our little ol’ life together.  We’re now engaged, planning a wedding and talking kids and future.  I can honestly say the way I feel about him right now is a different kind of love.  We have been tested by some of the hardest life experiences one person and a couple alone can go through.  What I learned is each obstacle brings us closer.  The problem is “If” we can endure the obstacle to make it through to the happiness again.  These obstacles take us through a whirlwind of emotions each time.  First we feel anger and confusion, then sadness and sometimes emptiness and loneliness.  These obstacles make us have a personal confrontation with pride.  Once we decide to get off the roller coaster of emotions and we decide to learn from the situation and let go of the problem, it’s just him standing there and I am more in love with him than ever before. 

Another thing that’s true for me is I guess it’s fair to say our honeymoon phase is over.  I don’t feel like I’m flying all the time but there are times of remembrance.  For example if he looks at me a certain way I feel butterflies.  When we hold hands I feel butterflies.  When he steps out for a few minutes and I hear him walking back into the house I want to run to him like a little kid.  When I’m at work and haven’t talked to him in a couple hours I miss him like it’s been a month of separation.  Shoot I miss him when he’s just sitting in the other room. The love is different.  It is greater.  It is stronger.  It is better.

For those couples who have been married for years.  I’m finally getting an appetizer of what this type of love feels like and… it feels nice.  I love it.  I want more of it and I pray we can endure all the hard times so we can fall more and more in love with each other.